How You Can Help Your Child.......

BE PROACTIVE!

Don't wait for someone to help you, because by the time that happens you may have waited too long. There are many great agencies and professionals who are trained to know how to best help your child. However, children can (and do) fall through the cracks. Do everything you can to get the help you need. Chances are, people are not going to be calling you up to offer help and advice - you have to be proactive in finding the resources your child needs.

DON'T STOP ASKING QUESTIONS!

If you don't fully understand something, feel like you are being excluded in decision making, or are simply uncomfortable with the recommendations you are given - question it and keep questioning it. Trust your gut instincts! As your child's guardian you will be the one to ultimately sign off on any and all decisions regarding his/her care. Insist on knowing what all options are and why the person recommending any particular option feels that way.

BE PREPARED...

Don't wait for something to happen with your child that you find yourself struggling to figure out how to help them. Learn about possible events and how you would handle them. Gather a list of resources for all eventualities. Talk with friends and family who have dealt with any crisis involving their children about how they handled it and/or what struggles they had finding resources to help. We have fire drills, earthquake drills, tornado drills, and so many other crisis drills to keep our children safe. Learn what you need to do to keep your child safe from unforeseen events, including keeping them safe from themselves. 

DEMAND HELP

 There are resources for your children. Speak up! Demand a case manager to help you navigate through the options available to you. Insist on being included in all decisions regarding your children. Find out what the arguments for and against different options are, before you make a final decision. There are advocates for just about any issue; educational, legal, medical, victim, mental health, etc. Your child has a right to those advocates! They will help you by being a voice for your child.

YOU ARE YOUR CHILD'S BEST ADVOCATE!

Regardless of how little professional knowledge you might have, you are still your child's best advocate. In fact, you are your child's primary advocate. You have the final say in all decisions. It is up to you to ensure that your child is best cared for. We must stop expecting other people and/or agencies to do all of the work. They have vast resources, training, and experience - and yet, they are hindered by lack of involvement by a child's family. We can no longer sit back and wait for others to do all of the work. Our children need us to fight for them - proactively.

ASK FOR HELP IN HELPING YOUR CHILD

If you need help in writing a letter, ask someone for that help. If you need advice on where to get started, ask for it. If you need help in navigating the internet for searches, get help with that. Seek out others who have dealt with similar situations with their children. I can almost guarantee that there is another parent/guardian out there who has gone through what you are going through. Ask questions about what did, and didn't, work for them. Do not allow pride and/or stigmas to stand in the way of helping your child.

DON'T GIVE UP!

Once you get started, you will find the going easier at times, and more frustrating at others. Do not give up! During the hardest of times, when you think that you cannot do it - look at your child and then ask what you would not do for him/her. Your child is depending on you. Giving up and giving in to the frustration and helplessness is essentially giving up on your child. Get the help and support you need, professional, family, friends, whatever and whomever can help you keep going - just don't give up.